Law Office of

Nora Daniels

Mediation by Choice

45 Cherry Place

Newton, MA  02465

Tel: 781-444-8888

Fax: 617-969-6922


Mediation to Stay Married (Marital Mediation and Couples Mediation)


What is “Marital Mediation” or “Mediation to Stay Married”?

Mediation to Stay Married (also known as Marital Mediation) is when couples voluntarily choose to meet with a trained mediator who serves as a neutral third party and assists the couple by facilitating non-adversarial and open conversations so that the couple may frankly discuss their issues and concerns in a constructive way with the goal of finding practical, workable solutions to their conflict and thereby allowing them to remain and continue as an intact couple.
Marital Mediation tends to achieve timely results and effective, concrete solutions, while providing the proactive benefit of setting the framework for better methods and skills for communicating with each other in the future.

What does the process provide?

The process provides a setting where couples can identify their areas of conflict; gain mutual understanding of each other’s concerns and interests; engage in creative brainstorming; resolve impasses; discuss and develop concrete plans or modes of action to address their marital issues; and then the parties can design and write their own agreements/methods for dealing with current and/or future issues.
Couples also have the option of putting agreements in writing.  For example, some couples would like written documentation ( a “Memorandum of Understanding”) of what they have agreed to during their Mediation to Stay Married session. Other couples feel that their verbal understanding and experience of having gone through the marital mediation process is effective enough and that a written agreement is unnecessary.  There is also the option of a full-blown agreement (such as a Postnuptial Agreement) which can be reviewed by separate attorneys for each spouse.

What types of issues can be addressed in “Marital Mediation” or “Mediation to Stay Married”?

Financial Issues – such as how funds are being spent or utilized; Issues of Contribution; Entrepreneurial Risk Taking; Inheritance Concerns; Expenditure Patterns;  Bankruptcy or Insolvency Issues: Job Loss.
Interpersonal Issues- such as Communication Stalemates and Misunderstandings; Unproductive Patterns of Behavior; Infidelity; Grieving Issues; Intimacy Concerns and Problems with Children.
Planning Issues – Questions relating to Educational Endeavors; Providing Security in the Event of Incapacity/Death; Medical Care; Care of Family Members.

In Marital Mediation/Couples Mediation  is it more appropriate to have a mediator who is also a attorney or a mediator who is a trained mental health professional?

A trained martial mediator will offer couples a practical and proactive approach to conflict resolution and will assist couples in building a foundation for using conflict resolution skills that can be applied to any conflict or situation they may encounter in the future. Mediation to Stay Married does not seek to identify or treat any deeply rooted interpersonal, physiological or psychological issues of couples or of either party in a relationship and it cannot take the place of counseling obtained from a trained and licensed mental health professional.

Mediators who are practicing attorneys and who are experienced in divorce mediation are able to readily  understand legal options, analyze many financial problems, address concerns about children and interpersonal communications and use such skills to assist the couple in finding concrete solutions to their concerns. Mediators who are practicing attorneys have the added experience of being able to draft and interpret contracts and agreements for parties, such as Postnuptial agreements or memorandums of understanding.

Mediators who are trained mental health professions can be particularly skilled in assisting couples in distress, in addressing grieving issues, or issues such as intimacy concerns and patterns of unproductive or destructive behavior.

In certain situations Marital Co-mediation is the optimum process to settle a dispute. It offers the benefit of working with two professionals who bring their complementary skills and experience to the process. At Mediation By Choice we offer Co-Mediation where a couple can benefit from mediation sessions with a practicing attorney and a licensed psychologist who is also a certified professional coach.

If you would like more information on how Marital Mediation or Couples Mediation or Co-Mediation Services can assist your situation please feel free to contact Mediation by Choice by telephone at 781-444-8888 or by email at and schedule a confidential appointment to discuss your concerns.